Authentic Mediation

So many people in the adult world are so used to mediating disputes between children for them.  Sometimes they listen to the problem.  Sometimes they don’t.  Mostly they barrel into a problem and decide they’re going to solve it for them.  They determine how they’re going to compromise or otherwise resolve the problem and inform them that they’re to act that way.  The kids say they will, because, after all, they have no power in that situation.  Then, most often, they return right back to old habits, because, after all, the solution was never theirs.

Once again, Sudbury schools do things differently.  Student disputes are just that: disputes between students.  Staff don’t come running to the rescue.  They don't get involved unless or until it escalates to a matter for the JC.  They let the kids work it out, because it’s far better to have practice resolving disputes from an early age than grow up without knowing how to do it.

The results are far superior.  We’ve watched children - even while angry - quickly regulate that anger and find solutions that are acceptable to everyone involved.  And they stick with those solutions, because they own them.  It isn’t artificial, like when an adult makes the decisions.  It’s spontaneous and authentic and real, and it gets real results.

Sean Vivier